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Who I Thought I Wanted To Be
Behind The Album
The story behind Who I Thought I Wanted To Be is essentially how it sounds. I wrote a lot of these songs during a time in my life where I thought I knew what I wanted. I always knew and still know that music is what I want to do with my life, but there's a few things that changed.
I'm unbelievably proud of this album and truly do love every song on it. I wrote all of these songs with the full mindset of following my dream to be a musician in Los Angeles (which you may be able to tell from some of the lyrics). Ever since I was young, I always knew I wanted to be a musician and live in Los Angeles. I'd always read about my favorite musicians playing huge venues and making it big in LA, so that's exactly what I wanted to do myself. That's what makes this album so special to me. After all those years, dreaming about being a musician and moving to LA, I finally did it.
As lame as it sounds, I thought I would move to LA, get working on my music and feel right at home. Maybe meet some cool music friends and start playing shows all around LA.
But that wasn't reality. Honestly, it’s hard for me to admit this because this is literally all I've wanted my whole life and I finally was living it. But after a few years of being in LA, I just wasn't feeling like it was my home. The weather and scenery is absolutely beautiful and that was exactly how I expected it but I couldn't make any close friends and wasnt playing any shows. I kinda didn't feel like myself. I felt lost and like I didn't fit in.
I started thinking that maybe I was trying to be someone I wasn't. Listening back on a lot of these songs, I truly love how they came out, but a lot of the lyrics just aren't who I am. I’m not someone to write lyrics about sex, drugs and all of that. I feel I was trying to write songs that I thought people would like, not songs that portray my actual personality.
So that got me thinking, maybe this isn't the life I thought I wanted. Sure, I definitely still want to be a touring musician, but maybe LA isn't the place for me. Maybe I don't need to be in LA to make it with music like I thought I did. I don't have to write songs about sex, money, and drinking to get people interested in my music. I think I'm realizing now that I was stuck in this fantasy of what I thought I needed to be, to be a professional musician. And that fantasy doesnt fit with who I am. I just need to write music that is authentic to me, and people who feel the same will find it.
So ‘Who I Thought I Wanted To Be’ is essentially that. A collection of songs I wrote about who I thought I wanted to be. A musician who needed to be in LA and write songs about things that don't align with my personality.
Again, I am so proud of these songs and truly love all of them, and I'm also so glad I moved across the country to LA. I got to live the dream I had since I was kid, even if it wasn't exactly how I envisioned it would be. For that I am so grateful for, and it helped me grow into a better musician and person. This album is incredibly sentimental to me because it brings my dream into reality. I did it, I wrote a whole album about my childhood dream of moving to LA and I actually lived it. Now I have this album as a memento to that dream and to that time in my life.
I am so proud and excited to share this album with you, and hope you enjoy it.
Who I Thought I Wanted To Be
The art is special to me as it signifies the beauty I felt and saw while living on the West Coast. It was truly life changing for me and an experience i'll never forget.
Thanks for being here
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