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The Devil And God
"I'm holding on to all the wrong things"
Behind The Song
This song is going back to my punk rock roots lol. I grew up listening to rock and punk mostly and those were the types of bands I grew up writing music for. I’ve been writing pop songs for a little bit now and decided I wanted to revisit the music that first inspired me. So I wanted to make a fusion of rock and pop and put it into a song and honestly, this is probably one of my favorite songs I’ve ever written.
This is more of an edgy song so that's how I wanted the lyrics to be as well. This song was fueled by a lot of anger. It’s about a relationship I had for a few years and when I found out I was being cheated on. There’s so many emotions that go through your head when you find out something like this, and this song is dedicated to the anger, betrayal, and hurt emotions that spiral through your head.
To go a little deeper, this song is about the aftermath and how I wanted revenge. I wanted that person to feel everything I went through. The betrayal of someone who’s supposed to love you more than life. The physical pain from consuming too much drugs and alcohol just to try and forget. The feeling of wanting to die curled up on the bathroom floor. The feeling of wanting to hate them so bad, but you can't help but miss them.
I am in no way trying to shame anyone, nor am I actually wishing this upon anyone, and I know I am far from innocent. I just wanted to express those certain feelings as they were at the time. I hope you can’t relate to this song but if you do, things do get better, I promise.
Of course I had to quote the greatest song about cheating “I Write Sins Not Tragedies - Panic! At The Disco”
Lyrics
I hate that you pointed out
Everything I hate about my self
It's so sad
Like wheres my self respect
Must've lost it with all your second chances
Holding on to the past
Cause it's all that I have
Leave a kiss on my cheek
While im shot in the back
Wish you could feel all the pain in my head
I wanna see your face
When he fucks with the Devil
And you see him as a God
I wanna be the pills
I wanna be the drinks
That you forcibly take
To feel something
I'm holding on to all the wrong things
I shouldn't miss
No I shouldn't miss
The smell of roses now
Two faced laying with the Gemini’s
3 years I wasted floating in lies
For all the scars you left on my health
5 months I spent tryna find myself
And I write sins not tragedies
Hope it sings in your head
When she's in your bed
Then tell me why it's hard to trust yourself
I wanna see your face
When he fucks with the Devil
And you see him as a God
I wanna see you drop to the floor
Hope your world caves in
Then you think of me
I'm holding on to all the wrong things
I shouldn't miss
No I shouldn't miss
The smell of roses now
I miss the wrong things
I miss the way I used to feel
When I was broken
I shouldn't miss this
I'm holding on to all the wrong things
I shouldn't miss
No I shouldn't miss
The smell of roses now
I miss the wrong things
I miss the way I used to feel
When I was broken
Thanks for being here
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